Do you and your partner struggle over money? Does it seem
like you can never agree on how to spend it? Do disagreements over money spill
over into the rest of your lives together?
Along with sex and
children
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Saric Jersey , money is at the top of the list of topics most couples
fight about. Inability to agree about money is all too often a major factor in
divorce. You and your partner don't have to fall into the "money trap", however.
Here are 5 steps you can take to resolve your money issues and enrich
your lives - financially and emotionally.
1. Don't talk about money -
talk about values. Rather than arguing over whether to buy a new car or put the
money toward your retirement account, start to talk to each other about the
underlying values you each hold. For
instance
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Jahlil Okafor Jersey , you may believe in "enjoying the moment" while your
partner is more concerned with securing the future. Talking about your values
doesn't mean that you will always agree, but it does give you the opportunity to
explore together what's really important to each of you.
2. Listen with
the "third ear". In other words, try to hear what your partner is expressing
under his or her words. Ask questions like: "What does a new car really mean to
you?" or "Do you know why it feels so important to you to put away every penny
you can?" Asking questions like these open the door to exploring your feelings
together and that is the Royal Road to intimacy.
3. Treat each other
tenderly. Once your partner has shared his or her feelings with
you
Cheap Markelle
Fultz Jersey , it's your job to be supportive and validating. NEVER
attack, criticize or belittle your partner's feelings. Sharing our feelings
leaves us feeling vulnerable. We need to know that we can trust our partner to
be tender and loving toward us at these times.
4. Demonstrate generosity.
It's important to be able to speak up for yourself and be clear about your wants
and needs. Sometimes though, it can be incredibly powerful to go along with your
partner's wishes just because you know something is especially important to him
or her.
5. Allow each other some autonomy. Each of you needs some amount
of money that is your's alone to be
spent
Cheap Amir
Johnson Jersey , saved or given away entirely as you choose. Some couples
maintain separate bank accounts. Some simply slot a certain amount of cash each
month for personal expenses. As Gibran said years ago in "The Prophet": "Let
there be spaces in your togetherness."
Author's
Resource Box
Peter Cole ChFC, LCSW, Holistic financial planning. Author: True Self True
Wealth. Peter Cole is a representative of Securities
America Cheap
Jerryd Bayless Jersey , a registered BrokerDealer member NASDSIPC and
Securities America Advisors an SEC registered investment advisor. FREE
newsletter at http:
Article Source:
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